Final Act

School's starting in three days. That means I still have three days to get my mind right and ready for one last semester of memorization and analysis.

Final sem. Final act. Final journey. Then off to face the real world. That scares the hell out of me.

I thought my friend was just being ridiculously emotional about the getting-out-to-face-the-real-world thing after her graduation a week ago. I thought it's corny and a huge waste of time. I can't believe I'm now being ridiculously emotional and corny while wasting a huge amount of my time being jittery about my future. As they say, people fear what they don't know. I don't know what's going to happen to me after I get out of school. If I get lucky, some millionaire relative that we never knew of will appear out of thin air and offer me the dream of my existence - to go to med school and become a kickass neurosurgeon. If the situation stays fucked up, I would end up in some company answering calls for a living. Right now, those are the choices - MED SCHOOL OR CALL CENTER.

While I was contemplating my future in my mom's bedroom yesterday, someone unexpected showed up. I kind of wish it was someone from the lottery company informing me that I just won the 315 M jackpot but it wasn't. It was my cousin who's getting married in December. I haven't seen him in a while considering he worked for the navy and got shot in one mission which sent our whole family in complete panicky chaos. He's surprisingly okay after the entire getting-shot-in-a-mission thing. He's one of the bravest people I know. Anyway, he went on asking me what's up and I went on telling him the usual answers - that everything was okay and there's nothing to worry about. Of course he asked about my studies and I told him I'm graduating soon. Then, the conversation I didn't want to have came. He asked what my plan was after college and I told him I want to go to med school. He encouraged me all right but at the same time, gave me an alternative.

"You can apply for the military. They have exams for aspiring officers going on."

An officer in the military. NOT BAD.

I was staring at him with wide eyes while he was giving me a first-hand orientation about the life in the military. He said people are going to go easy on me so I have nothing to worry about. The training sessions for officers are quite different from the training sessions for the enlisted. Overall, he's quite sure I'm going to survive it and I'm going to be one of the badass officers of the military someday. After that, my sister showed up and interviewed him about not-so-college stuff and so I took the opportunity to disappear from the scene.

Since we haven't seen each other in a while, my cousin went to get us some burgers for merienda and told us a lot of stories about his military life. Of course we asked about his fiancee and he was willing enough to tell stories about her. Well, all I can say is that I'm happy that he's finally getting married.

I can't stop thinking about my cousin's sudden show-up yesterday.

Was it a sign? Is God telling me I have more choices than I think?

I have no idea.

But the military is not bad.

I'll think about it.